Lips Of An Angel
by SuperHanniTorchLock
Summary: Cas calls Dean late one night knowing he hasn't got long left. (AU - they're both human, and oblivious to the hunter world)


Dean Winchester was woken by a phone ringing. He lifted his head up and twisted it around to look at the bedside; no phone. Dean groaned in his pillow so he didn't wake up Lisa. He rolled out of bed and quietly padded into the living room. He found the phone and answered it in hushed tones.

"Mmm, hello?" _Still a bit out of it_. He shook his head in attempt to wake himself up and put the phone back to his ear.

"Hello Dean."

Well Dean was awake now.

"Cas?" The nickname rolled off his tongue easily.

"Cas, are you okay? Are you- are you crying?" Dean whispered when Cas let out a ragged breath.

At Dean's words Cas let out a strangled chuckle. "Yes, I'm - fine. I just needed to talk to you."

Dean's eyebrows furrowed. Why did Cas need to talk all of the sudden? After a _year_ _and_ _a half_?

"Cas, it's the middle of the night, it's kinda hard to talk right now..." Dean trailed off, listening to the other man's laboured breathing. Had he been running or something?

"What?" Cas breathed out.

Dean hesitated. "Nothing. Sorry. I can't be too loud. There are people sleeping. That's what usually goes on this time of night." He whispered matter-of-factly.

On the other side of the phone, Cas closed his eyes and clenched his teeth. He knew Dean well enough to hear everything in his voice he was trying to hide.

* * *

"There are people sleeping? I assume you mean Lisa?"

"Yes. My girl's in the next room. Speaking of which, how's Matthew doing?" Dean knew when he'd got together with Cas that the other had a boyfriend. Not that it stopped him at all.

Dean heard Cas exhale sharply. "Sometimes I wish he was you, you know?"

"Huh. Well, I guess we never really moved on."

"No, I guess not. Look, Dean, I-

"It's really good to hear your voice say my name, especially after a year and a half of silence."

Cas was still breathing hard, but otherwise the other end of the line was silent. Dean continued. "It sounds so sweet, Cas, like heaven. Coming from the lips of an angel."

"Dean," Cas panted. "Dean, I love you.

"Dean are you there?"

It was shocking to hear him say those words again, after so long. Dean sat down on a nearby stool, running a hand through his bedhair. "Ye-yeah Cas, I'm here. You know... hearing those words... it makes me think back to our times together... and God does it make me weak."

At the other end of the line, Cas sat, remembering the fun they'd had. The first date, that kiss. The evening that had followed. Tears stung his eyes but he willed them away.

* * *

Dean could hear stirring in the other room. Probably Lisa coming to check on him.

He opened his mouth to tell Cas he needed to hang up _and finally get over you _but the words never came. He let out a breath as soon as Cas sucked one in. He was still panting like he was having trouble breathing.

That of course made him remember Cas' mouth. _His lips. _Dean used to love those lips. Loved kissing them, tracing them with his fingers late at night.

He exhaled again. "Dammit Cas. I really need to go, but I keep thinking of those lips of yours. Lips of an angel."

* * *

"You know," Dean continued. "It's funny that you're calling me tonight. You see, I was dreaming about you again."

"Dean, please don't go. Dean, I dreamt of you too." Cas breathed.

"Does Matthew know you're talking to me? Is this conversation gonna start a fight between you two?"

Cas glanced sideways at the driver's seat. Matthew was covered in blood, and there were no signs to indicate he was alive. "No, it won't start a fight, Dean." He choked out. "What about Lisa? Did you tell her about us?"

Dean shook his head, then remembering Cas couldn't see him, replied. "No, I haven't told her. I don't think she has a clue. Cas, are you sure you're okay?"

* * *

Dean could hear Cas take a deep breath in to reply but that quickly turned into a series of hacking coughs. Dean pressed the phone closer to his face to cover the speaker.

"I'm fine. Going to be fine." He didn't sound so sure.

"Cas... I have to go soon... Lisa..." Dean trailed off. The more he realized he needed to hang up the harder it was. "It's not hard to admit that, damn, I wish it were you in there. I know I've said it before, but..." Dean got quieter as he finished his sentence.

Cas made a slight huffing noise. Dean automatically put a smirk to the sound, one that he used to get everyday.

"I haven't moved on Dean. Neither have you." Cas said it so matter-of-factly. Dean dropped his face into the hand that wasn't holding his phone. Cas was so right.

"I like it when you say my name. I like your voice. It's sweet. Bittersweet." _Those lips again. _

Dean heard a sharp intake of breath. "Cas, why won't you tell me what's going on?" There was something wrong and Cas was avoiding it.

"Dean, I miss you. I miss you and I wish things could've been different." Dean pulled the phone away from his face to stare at it. Cas was getting quieter and everything he said was starting to sound eerily like a goodbye.

"Cas, me too. More than anything, man. Thinking about it- fuck, it makes me weak." Dean exhaled. A breath he didn't even know he was holding.

* * *

Dean heard Cas sniffle down the line. "Cas are you saying goodbye? Look, whatever you're thinking of doing, don't. I... I don't want to say goodbye. Not to you. Not ever. Please, Cas, we can talk about this."

A laugh followed by a hacking cough was his immediate reply. "Dean, It's not like that-

"Then what is it like?"

"Dean, I tried so hard to be faithful to Matthew. I really tried. You made it so difficult to stay with him. I could hear you calling me in my dreams, with your perfect lips, so angelic."

"Cas, stop avoiding the question. What's going on? Are you alright?"

* * *

"I used to love waking up to you every morning that I could. You would say my name like I was important. Like I meant the world to you. I think about those days more than I should."

Dean heard the wistfulness and sorrow in his voice.

"I miss those days too, Cas..." _You were the most important thing to me. Hasn't changed much. _

"I wish I could've heard that sooner. Maybe things would've been different." Dean knew that tone of voice. He wasn't talking about the break up.

"Cas! Tell me what's wrong!" Dean demanded, nearly forgetting to be quiet. "I still care about you..." Dean trailed off in a much lower voice. Maybe to serve as some kind of motivation.

"I still love you, Dean." Cas stated.

"Dammit, Cas! Stop saying that." There was nothing either of them could do about it, so why bother reiterating it again and again? Dean loved hearing Cas say those words. He loved Cas. The best thing to do was to get over it and say goodbye.

* * *

"Cas, I really have to go-

"Please, Dean. Don't go."

_Okay, now something's definitely wrong. _Dean could tell from the other's voice that something bad had happened. "Cas?" He began gently. "Cas, what's wrong, sweetheart? Is it Matthew, has he hurt you?" A sudden burst of anger flared up inside Dean at the thought.

"No," Cas sighed. "Nothing like that. I just... I wanted to apologise. About not leaving him for you. I tried so hard to be faithful, I ended up denying myself the thing that made me happy. You made me happy, Dean, and" he broke off suddenly, and Dean heard harsh coughs through his phone.

"Cas? Cas what's wrong?"

"Nothing, Dean, I'll be fine."

"Fine, my ass. Where are you, I'm going to come and get you."

"No, Dean."

"But Cas, you sound like you're in pain. Tell me where you are."

"It's too late Dean."

* * *

"Castiel, that better not be a goodbye. If you are trying to say goodbye to me I swear I will find you and kick your ass." Dean was standing up and pacing nervously.

Dean heard weak laughter turn into more of those nasty coughs. He was this close to hopping in his car and forcing Cas to tell him where he's at.

There was a little voice in the back of Dean's mind telling him, _Winchester, you have a life. You need to hang up. _He was never good at listening to that voice though.

"Cas, I love you." _Why won't you tell me what's going on?_

* * *

"I'm sorry Dean, it's too late." Tears started flowing from Dean's eyes, and he made no effort to wipe them away. "I love you too, Dean."

"Cas, please. Where are you, I'll come get you."

"Don't do this Dean, please." Cas coughed and Dean flinched at the harshness of the sound.

Eyes watering, Dean replied. "But I love you Cas. I need you. What's wrong? Why are you calling me so late?"

There was no reply. "Cas? Cas answer me goddamit. I'm going to get you. Don't you dare die on me you son of a bitch."

Somewhere about 5 miles from Dean's house, Cas' eyes slowly glazed over, reflecting unseen stars.


End file.
